EEEZ NO PROBLEM

It was 6:00am. My hubby was driving me to work. I just happened to look out my window to the right and saw, mostly hidden in brush, the "underside" of a car. I said to Hubby "Pull over, drop me off and call 911. Tell them to dispatch to a MVA. We have no idea if there are injuries." (once an ER nurse always an ER nurse). Hubby drove off and I started climbing through brush. So much for the clean uniform. I was just figuring out how to maneuver around the vehicle when I thought. "I hope there's not a madman back here in the swamps of South Carolina". What I found instead was a dazed tall man standing in the woods just starring. I started talking to him and he walked right past me out to the road. I said "Stop" I just want to make sure your OK" He responded "Eeez OK. Eeez OK". I said "Sit down". He did. The smell of booze was powerful. I let him know "I'm going to touch you and you tell me if it hurts". "Eeez O.K.,
Eeez O.K. Eeez O.K." was his only response to my TNCC process. It was all I could do to get him to sit and not walk away as he kept attempting to get up. I told him I was going to keep holding his head straight but he kept fussing. Then I heard the Sirens. The first to show up was the Sheriff Department. I gave them a quick report and stepped back to watch the show. The look on their faces told me they knew this was an intoxicated driver. The man kept repeating "Eeez O.K." Finally one of the Sheriffs stepped up to him and said "Eeez not OK bud. Turn around and put your hands behind your back" Nuff said...he was leaving with Johnny Law. My husband had called the ER, told them I'd be late but I was coming. As I got off the elevator I looked down at my muddy uniform and shoes. The other staff said "Where the hell were you" I responded "Climbing around the swamp with a Sheriff Deputy".

Can't always trust the Interpreter

One chapter in my nursing career involved visiting local plants and providing Flu shots to the line workers. Many at this plant were Hispanic. After setting everything up I told the Line Supervisor (also Hispanic) " Ask them to line up and pull up the sleeve of their shirts so I can easily get to the (Deltoid) muscle". He announced something very loud. The next thing I knew all the line workers were laughing, undoing their belts and pulling their pants down! I said to the line Boss "Whoa, whoa...arm! Not butt!" He burst out laughing and said "I know. I just wanted to mess with them".

Times May Have Changed but Addiction Hasn't

When I was 19 yrs old I was a student nurse and experienced my first awakenning to the power of the addiction to cigarettes. It was back when patients were still allowed to smoke in the hall outside their rooms. Yes folks that really was allowed! My patient was standing there, inhaling his non-filtered Camel through his trach!! I can remember thinking "that shit has an
in-humane hold on him". The same year I went out with a group of people getting together to celebrate someone's one year anniversary of kicking Heroin. He slapped his pack of smokes down on the table and said "I quit junk! But I can't stop these". That was over 30 yrs ago. Hosital rules have changed. 5 years ago I would walk out of the hospital and pass patients standing outside holding their IV poles...smoking. When hospitals became "No Smoking" environments there were many staff sneaking outside during their shifts, standing by a dumpster to catch a smoke. Rain or snow didn't matter. Now we have Nicotine Patches on standing admit orders, "No Smoking Campuses" and healthcare workers have to be pretty skilled, or slick, to pull off a smoke. But what has always shocked me the most? Watching the Respiratory Therapists head out for theirs.